We can't have non-princesses going around wearing those glittery shirts that say "Princess" on them.
And a new generation of total bitches emerges.
"Ana5539" wears a barrel to school.
I'm seriously not going to let any kid of mine on the Internet until they're about 40. To hell with you people.
I get the feeling "sweetscent" has a farting problem.
It's been 30 years. It might be time to consult a doctor.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.