Bee pit's empty, that birthday party kicked all the bees out of it. Tommy, sweep them up. Stephanie, I need you to get a few bags from the back. Use the push cart, they're like 20 pounds apiece.

social vegan

me: *rushes into doctor's office, out of breath and excited* D-doctor, Doctor! I've got HIVES!

doc: *eyes light up, he ushers me in and I lay on the paper on the table* *he inspects my severe allergic bodywide rash, gradually slowing down and stopping as he looks to me*

doc: ...n-not even one *pouts and leaves room*

me: *frowns as tears mix with what must be honey oozing from my eyes*

social vegan

The whole town piled in the waiting room that day, spilling along the hallway and into the medical suite.

Dr. Handel hovered over little Billy's swollen arm. The crowd murmured and gasped. Could it be.

Dr. Handel turned to all, a deep frown settling on his face, "It's just hives"

The crowd's eyes lit up, a quiet applause began.

Dr. Handel sighed.

Jerry Mumphrey

i've been gluing sewing needles to flies for weeks now

death sext

bees are just big ants

Plebian Parasite

Bee movie but everytime they say the word bee actual live bees shoot from your computer monitor


"Ok class now lets try drawing a square"

*all the bees draw a hexagon*

"no..no we already know you can draw hexagons, lets try again... just four sides this time"

*all the bees draw a hexagon again*

"...ok...one more time... a square... only four sides"

Piso Mojado

i think we could use less bees, maybe even no bees tbqh

mister magpie

this is quite the controversial opinion

mister magpie

*setting: a round table discussion with several notable academics.*

richard dawkins: "what we can all agree on, however, is the need for more bees."

piso mojado, blowing bubbles out of a pipe: "actually, my dear friend, we need fewer bees. perhaps even...no bees."

social vegan

*the Baha Men look at their feet and kick the dust around a tiny ajar bee door*

Ultra Spoot

But all joking aside guys, we really need to start brainstorming ways to help bees, it's a serious issue *gets stung once* OH GOD FUCK BEES, FUCKING KILL EM ALL

– David "g0m" Dolan (@g0m)

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