We're all familiar with prestigious accolades like The Emmys, The Oscars, and The Blockbuster Music Awards, but did you know doing stuff on the Internet can yield similarly priceless trophies and medals? Yes, it's true. Yet, in 15 years of writing for the web, I've utterly failed to win a single award that's just as valid as the more popular ones and not at all designed to prop up a rapidly dying medium. At the risk of burning some very important bridges, allow me to share my list of the awards that I should have received for my unique talents, but didn't.
BLACK LIVES MATTER!!! NOOOOOOO!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? YOU HAVE CREATED A MONSTER, AN ABSOLUTE MONSTER!
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Play your entire PS1 library from a single SD card. But not your Brady Strategy Guides.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.