Does humanity have a slogan yet? Because I've got a pretty good one: Humanity - We aren't even trying anymore.

I hope there's a contest with prizes.


I still like the little 3.0 rating graphic Gamepro magazine used. I don't know if they still use it because I haven't looked at a Gamepro in a while, but just look at the little guy, he looks so ineffectual and yeilding. "Oh, this game's all right I guess. I mean, I'll play it some more if you want to play two player with me. You don't want to? That's cool. Hey, you know that Burger King bag you threw away about an hour ago? Is it okay if I dig it out of the trash and have those 4 fries that were in the bottom of the bag? I'm sorry, I just didn't want to bother you about it earlier." Hee hee, I love him.

I saw a dude cut a couch up with a chainsaw once and that, my friends, was some wild shit.

ya i double click all the time why u ask
ya i double click all the time why u ask

My my, how the tables have turned! The fucker becomes the fucked, as it were!

Speaking of retroactive, why isn't there any retroactive birth control?

Big ups to my main man "GANGSTA3" for being precisely as helpful as a Gamepro video game review while only wasting 5 seconds of our time instead of 45.

This is the most amazing story ever told it makes my heart burn like the noonday sun and my loins quiver like a sick animal.

Carlos Mencia told me to change the channel, though not directly.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

About This Column

There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.

Previous Articles

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2018 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.