WEIRD VIDEOS, submitted by Nifty. The Internet is chock full of nutty lunatics obsessed with their own paranoid delusions, unaware that the rest of the free world doesn't give a damn about their idiotic opinions and conspiracy theories. But enough about Something Awful, let's talk about another site now. "WEIRD VIDEOS" is one of the first conspiracy nutbag sites audacious enough to charge money for their schizoid theories regarding the evil US government, aliens, satan, and the highly-touted New World Order. Yes, you too can pay $10 to get a DVD explaining how we're all apparently "sex slaves for Uncle Sam." Now THAT'S why I wake up every morning with a bruised ass!
We're victims of hideous accidents and deaths. My friend Jeff was killed in a car wreck driving drunk at 70 miles per hour down the wrong side of the 405 Freeway at Midnight. A Mac Truck slammed head on into his car. Jeff wants to tell you his story and show you his accident photo album! His family is being sued. Unfortunately, they did not have PrePaid Legal Service! My other buddy, Benny burned to death in bed, drunk, while smoking a cigarette. His album is really a burned up mess, but has some great corpse photos of Benny. Frank, Benny's brother died of cancer from chain smoking and taking too many hard drugs. His autopsy photo footage is his pride and joy. So, we would like to share our gory experiences with you by offering our DEATH SCENES SERIES videos for your entertainment. We know you'll die laughing or die vomiting over our death scenes.
You can also find high-quality footage of dancing Nazis, drag queens, and child prostitution for sale. Because, you know, it's weird. And a video.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.