New Covenant Church of God, submitted by Yeah Way. When you visit a religious website count how many times you have to use your mouse's scroll wheel to get to the bottom of the page. Three or less and it's the usual stuff. Four to seven and maybe it's just a really bad design for a website. When you hit the double digits you are stone cold guaranteed a healthy dose of crazy.

Welcome to NCCG.ORG and to one of the largest, most comprehenive and challenging Christian homepages on the Web. It's sole purpose: to win souls for Christ, build the end-time Church and to prepare all true believers for the imminent return of Yah'shua the Messiah (Jesus Christ).

Planning for the End Times, even if you believe in that sort of stuff, seems an awful lot like planning to win the lottery. I guess the big difference is that I have never actually heard of anyone winning the Rapture.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.