The Ancient Art of Labia Stretching (Contains Nudity: Not Safe f, submitted by Abraham, I think..

How come anything a woman can think to do with her bits is an ancient artform that’s been practiced for centuries and empowers and educates women about their bodies and is deeply spiritual and aesthetically amazing, but anything men do with their junk is basically just perverse? I don’t know, but I like it that way!


The artistic nature of stretching the inner vaginal lips is perceived by the provocative change that a woman does to her body. Looking at all angles of the body, you will tend to focus your attention to her vaginal region and more importantly at the length of her vaginal lips. It is a visual art, a tactile art and an art of sexual intrigue as a woman does it with the intention of attracting a mate as was the case for the women in remote tribes around the world.

Yes, or maybe it’s just fun to yank on your bits! Fine, be my guest, as long as it’s not hanging out of your skirts or anything, with little dogs yapping and jumping at it and whatnot.

– Dr. David Thorpe (@Arr)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.