Fuck Cum Poet, submitted by HAL Capone. The "Fuck Cum Poet" infrequently writes semen and sex themed poetry. Red text on a black background. Titanic waves of meat batter. This one is dedicated to the Fuck Cum Poet's infant son:
RIGHT NOW YOU SLEEP
IN A CRIB
AND YOUR COCKLING SLEEPS
IN A SLEEPING BAG
SOME SWEET LOVE DAY
LUST PILLOWS WILL AWAKEN YOU
SOME SWEET DAY SOON AFTER
TANGY PULSE WALLS WILL AWAKEN YOUR COCKLING
AND IT WILL NO LONGER BE A COCKLING
IT WILL BE A LOVE JACKHAMMER
RAMMING RAMMING DRNG-DRNG-DRNG-DRNG
IT WILL ECHO IN HER HEAD
AND IN HER DRIPPING MONS CAKE
YOU WILL TAKE HER WITH YOUR
YOU WILL WASH HER LUST PILLOWS
WITH OCEANIC CUM
The site doesn't even really need a joke to make it funnier. Every poem is hilarious.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.