FOX-mas doesn't take place until December 12, giving people plenty of time to get involved or become appalled, depending on their reaction to a furry con billed as "strictly 18+, having some adult panels, an uncensored dealer's den, and will be PDA-tolerant." For the past three years, this anthropomorphic bacchanalia took place at the co-organizer's house, but apparently the demand for Yuletide yiffery was so great that it now requires half a hotel.
This is the type of event for which "I heard this will be a slutfest-orgy, is that true?" ranks among the FAQs. The organizers reply "absolutely not," but if you're a "mundane," it will probably come a lot closer to that description than you've ever wanted to witness. So, here's the advance notice to all "mundies": Stay the fuck away from the Holiday Inn at the Rochester, NY Marketplace on December 12, or the whole month, just to be safe. And let the in-laws stay at your place instead of putting them up at FOX-mas HQ, unless you want the holiday dinner dominated by overheard hotel staff anecdotes (or horrified first-person accounts) about what that Dog-faced Santa was doing to his reindeer.
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Elliot said my breakup must have been due to the sweater curse, an unexplained phenomenon where anyone who gives their significant other a hand-knit sweater gets dumped. The only way to break the curse, Elliot said, was to destroy the sweater.
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