"Jesus believes in evolution -- and he hates it."
How did Eric Gray, the author behind the Web site Jesus Believes in Evolution (and the book of the same name) arrive at this provocative conclusion? The short answer follows this logic: Jesus and the rest of the gods of world religions might well be aliens, and these space deities are engaged in cosmic war over genetic resources, resulting in selective, strategic quickening of the natural evolutionary process, which Jesus rejects as a proponent of fair play.
The long answer unfurls a painstaking tapestry of connected pages, on which every sentence contains a link to another elaborate explanation of the great monotheistic extraterrestrial conspiracy. Gray claims "All these facts are thoroughly documented in the links," and looking at the intimidating morass of clickable blue, visitors might be inclined to take his word for it. Or they could ignore the text and concentrate on the amusing graphics and captions.
Are we not allowed to be real parents anymore? We may have feared the CyborFreaks, but we damn well respected them and learned about boundaries.
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.