As a corollary to the twice-featured Armor of God PJs, I present WholesomeWear, the aquatic division of the Ghastly Christian Apparel monolith. WholesomeWear offers three swimsuit models, all of which combine Spandex skin with a cumbersome polyester exoskeleton. These designs allegedly "draw the eye to the face," but they're more likely to attract full-body attention, as spectators blurt "look at that crazy woman/poor girl wearing a dress in the pool." WholesomeWear claims the outer layer adds modesty (certainly) and style (no), neglecting to mention the cardiovascular benefits inherent in attempting strenuous exercise while swathed in sopping-wet fabric.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.