While checking up on the thrice-featured Xtreme Strength gallery, now more than ever your source for hilarious Photoshops of women repelling bullets with their steel vaginas and crushing motor vehicles with their super-powerful asses, I came across Xtreme Strength Ministries, one of those inspirational outfits staffed by the Lord's own circus strongmen. As depicted in this slide show, the members of this group use their divinely ordained brawn to perform heroic acts such as hoisting small wooden crosses and attending sparsely populated strawberry festivals.
"The most important thing that a spectator will see lifted at an Xtreme Strength Team crusade is the Mighty Name of JESUS -- and that will be lifted high!"
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.