I literally defy you to tell the difference between the distorted guitar "tone" on this "song" and your speakers dying. I tried playing this song through both my semi-expensive 8.1 surround sound system and my junk-ass no-name brand speakers from 1994 that I took a huge shit on during a particularly bad acid trip and it sounded exactly the goddamn same.
GZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTSCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZPPPP. PRAISE GOD. PSSGGGGGGGGZZZZZZZZGGHHT.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Did you know that you only use 10% of your brain? You may have heard that before. But what if you could use 100%? YOU CAN!
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!