Hello and welcome to another AwfulVision™! Here at AwfulVision™, we pride ourselves on many things: our intelligent and insightful commentary on the best Youtube™ has to offer, our snappy attire and - new for Q4 2007 - our ability to make morbidly obese girls, who claim to not give a fuck what anyone says about them, throw a bitchfit and delete their Youtube™ account.
If you tuned in last week, you saw our expose on msjackie69. Jackie, who has several pending warrants for impersonating a sack of mashed potatos, is (or should I say was) a Youtube™ vlogger of epic and terrifying proportions. Her videos featured anything from her smearing cat food andchocolatefeces on her face to talking about how nasty her pussy was. She was also very, very fat.
I have some good news, some bad news, and some hilarious news:
AwfulVision™ - Changing lives, one vlogger at a time.
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
U2 and Apple have conspired to place a U2 album into your music in the year 2014. You own a U2 album. And you can't get rid of it.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!