Hi folks. We're finishing up spring cleaning this week here at Ye Olde AwfulVisione, and just like last week we've got like 6 pages of shit I was too lazy to use before now plus some new stuff that was pretty funny.
Some of this shit stretches back to October, so if I accidentally slip one in that I've done before, I'm sorry. I would have went back and checked to make sure I didn't use any of these but reading my own writing physically pains me so I guess enjoy some slightly different jokes in the case that one slips by me!
Here's a horrifying drag queen singing a parody of Sir Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back" entitled "Baby Got Front". Get it?! A dick! In the front! Because it's a drag queen! Also worth noting is that this video is in response to a video that may be even more impossibly shit called "Jackie Beat vs. Mariah Carey" and while I didn't watch it to confirm, I am going to go on record as assuming that the loser in the bout is all of mankind.
This little troll has a face only a mother could beat into a bloody paste with a brick.
Here's a video where you get to see some bitch's pussy. Don't say I never did anything for you guys!
As of the time I'm writing this, only 8 people have viewed this absolute masterpiece. I think it's time to change that.
I'm going to order like a dozen of these and use them to store my Wendy's Baconator coupons.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!