Hamiltonian Bicycle's idea of Polish turkeys is horribly racist. There's nothing wrong with proud American poultry, so why look abroad?
The following three inventions come from hellbastard, who has created more worthless ideas in his time than Jerry Betamax.
Iron Bitchface lives in perpetual fear of the mythical pyromaniac mummy.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.