Remember Google Glass? Haha what a New Coke-style fiasco, it's a good thing they abandoned that embarrassing plan almost immediately. But I'm glad this ill-fated 'innovative' product briefly made headlines, because it inspired Tip to Photoshop trail-blazing cyborg Steve Mann. This, in turn, restored relevance to the classic FYAD thread about Mann's July 2012 misadventures in a Paris McDonalds. So let's revisit that incident - read about it here to refresh your memory or learn about it for the first time! - then we'll flash-forward to those recently posted Photoshops!
please i don t understand what his cyborg thing is did he invent a glass eye that you wear like a robot instead of regular way and hes mad it ruined mcdonalds tour of europe
he made himself look like donald sutherland in the movie "virus" and got a doctors note that said hes allowed to look like donald sutherland as much as he likes, but they just ripped it up and pushed him
the french translation part of his doctors note just says "This guy is an homo lol, look at that robot eye thing. if hes eating mcdonalds take his Mango Mcflurry using a flurry of punches"
its not even a computer its just a camera and theres a little screen on the inside so its like youre looking through a normal eye except more retarded and the Perps chased him down for pronouncing poutine wrong earlier in the fast food vacation
Perpetrator 2 (2012)
Did You Know?
Steve Mann pissed himself really bad, in public, and everyone could see it and it broke his iPhone
Steve Mann refers to himself as a cyborg. He's actually just a gay weirdo with a webcam.
Incorrectly Regarded As Goofs
When I insanely brutally threw him out of McDonalds
Perhaps the most egregious plotline of Parisians, Woody Allen's latest & his second love letter to France's capital, involves Andy Garcia--here wearing some absurd computer device over his eye, unexplained--being attacked in a McDonald's restaurant and pissing himself in fear. The rest of his scenes, largely without jokes and randomly interspersed between the Nicholson and Fassbender plots, recount drab details of his lawsuit against the franchise.
Bonjour... Ineed your clothes, boots, and two Ranch Wraps, one burger, and one mango McFlurry
i went back to the table and i took my first tentative bite of the ranch wrap, checking in my peripherals to make sure i had the attention of at least one witness. the crispy chicken cut into the roof of my mouth and i cried out in pain, i turned to my family for support only to find that they had been replaced with perpetrators 1 and 3 and a mango mcflurry. i scanned the restaurant frantically for perpetrator number two but i knew somehow that he was already long gone, and my family and my mcchicken with him.
By that point i had come to understand that there was no perp 2, there were just 2 guys labeled perp 1 and perp 3 to trick me and now my ranch wrap (hereby refered to as good eats) was cold
I would have gotten away with it, too, but my screensaver came on right when I was about to elude possible perpetrators 2-7, 9
The perpetrators were moving about so quickly that they became difficult to track, let alone number, and my computer glasses became so overheated trying to evaluate their movement patterns that even the chill of a delicious Mango McFlurry could not cool my sweaty brow
We received our food from the cashier, who i will refer to as "the hunter." i was then approached by the first perpetrator, who i have named "hugo van der goes." outside, the whole incident was witnessed by "mr slip and slide." perhaps i should have developed a more coherent labeling system for this recollection, but "c'est la vie" as they say in the land of ranch wraps.
The fifth phase of the week is upon us. Shops close, bars open, and we are free from the Bosses once more. But They Who Were Before Time await our tribute...
Hungry? Try looking around for a little something called ASTRONAUT FOOD. Or you can hold out until you get to Pluto and look for some berries... if you want to starve to death!
We'd like to thank Mr. Elba for taking the time to make this possible.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.