The white cabinet structure likely holds weaponry, inspect it for items which you can deploy more quickly than your standard-issue club.
I have opened the white cabinet. The temperature inside is much cooler than outside.
Take the bag marked "Tom" and eat its contents.
I have consumed the contents.
The human has reappeared, and is making a gurgling noise.
Reclaim your fuck and use your club to hold the human hostage. Demand that he bring you to the internet.
I have retrieved Fuck and exposed my weapon. But the human retreated!
It appears to have run into the door on the left.
I have given pursuit.
THE INTERNET! Destroy it with your club!
That will do no good. We're on a mission to insert a virus.
Mr The Icon posted:
The human will fit nicely in the metal box he is huddled next to. Place him inside so he does not interfere with the next stage of the mission.
Human inserted into box.
After years of being misunderstood, I had hoped we finally had "our" story. I was wrong.
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.