See if you can distract the human with any purses you still have on you. If she agrees, trade them for access to her terminal.
This human is resistant. It refuses and says "No, Max, I will not go on another date with you."
What is Max?
It appears this human is of low clearance and does not have access to the high access clearance to the internet I need. It is useless.
This one appears to be diseased: note the large tumors on the upper segment of its torso! Quickly, strike them! It may spread!
Max is Human for "unless you best me in a fight".
Commencing attack on tumors!
Assert your dominance by showing how wide you can unhinge your jaw.
It seems impressed.
Perhaps we should continue our mission, commander?
Give her the human compliment and continue past her.
I have arrived at a pair of metal portals.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.