no they will not
Link visits his gay sisters house to find his boomerang he forgot at her place but instead finds feelings and showers nude in one scene
Some Other Guy
a bisexual link who is sexually active during key parts of the story seems good to me
Link can get a boner anytime haha but he can only cum if he has full hearts (now called empathy kernels)
thinking maybe a romance side game would be a good way to really scream "this is NOT your parents link!" possible options for romance: zelda(duh), malon, impa, twinrova(two chicks at once. ohhh yeah), ganondorf, heck, maybe even tingle.
link is juggling saria and zelda and takes them out to a date on the same night at the same restaurant, which is promptly leveled by a suicide bomber
link and zelda are able to watch black is the new orange together and not even feel the least bit awkward about the steamy parts
instead of breaking pots link now kicks down doors, rummages through cabinets, and pockets consumer electronics in what some would call a home invasion but what he calls the hylian hustle
Link spins poi to hylian breakbeats and uses them to light torches so bars slide off doors in dungeons
The potions are all drugs
"Your left eye," the optometrist casually explained while blasting my face with a blue laser at point blank range, "is farsighted and shaped like an eyeball. The other eye is nearsighted and shaped like a football. Not even a good football."
Jeff Foxworthy has awakened to the new flesh to tell some redneck jokes.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.