In some quarters, Ted Williams would require an introduction, a sentence or so about how this Army veteran and voice-over artist suffered from substance addiction, scrapped to survive on the streets, and recently earned attention and job offers due to his still-golden tone. But you are reading this on the Internet, which means he's already old-hat to you, and now you're excited about some new viral video, which you'll be bored with by the end of this paragraph. Anyway, even the cynical SA Forum Goons celebrated the man's good fortune, calling him a "wise, humble dude" and proclaiming "rebound you did, sir," which is the kind of thing Williams himself will be saying as a newly hired Cleveland Cavaliers announcer, on the rare occasion that a Cav cleans the glass. It took two whole days to go from "Feel good story " to "let's paste his head on assorted bodies for our amusement," but that transition indeed took place, and I better share the images before this inspiring story exhausts its online goodwill.
Republicans announce that all legislation must be voted on at 2am in a secret chamber, with no one but the lobbyists who write the bills seeing a single line of text. Democrats' Response: Stumbling around a field stepping on rakes, handles smashing them directly in their faces every single time.
There is a witch hunt going on right now and I promise you that you will not find any witches in the pleasure room in my congressional office.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
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The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.