Is, for the most part, all true. It stemmed from a trip I took to Missouri a few weeks ago. During that trip I got to meet Lowtax, who took me and my roommates out to dinner. He ordered a steak that promised him an "Adventure to Flavortown". Unfortunately, his adventure ended with about a quarter of a steak to go when I showed him my awesome cyst. He told me to write an update about it so here it is.
I've heard it's called a "ganglion cyst" or something like that. It doesn't hurt or constrict my movement, but it's on my ring finger and I'm getting married in a few months. It will probably have to go unless I can find an XXL wedding ring to cover it. Who knows.
I don't have a lot else to say in this Daily Dirt, but I'd like to encourage you all to read Pregame Wrapup if you get a chance. I try to make it as accessible as possible, so hopefully you can all get at least one chuckle out of each article. On that note I'm taking out a hit on Adam Morrison next time around, so that's always fun.
The human anatomy is home to more than three hundred organs. Doctors and chocolatiers agree that the vast majority of these revolting lumps of tissue serve little to no function. If you find yourself standing in a long line or stuck at the airport waiting for a delayed flight, consider taking a few minutes to remove the following from your person.
Do you have what it takes to make it on the ballot?
Denzel is here to set the movie scales back to zero. That's what an equalizer does, right?
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!