Credit goes mostly to Josh "Livestock" Boruff on this update, because not only did he come up with the wonderful soup-at-war idea, he also made the fantastic images. I feel like a chump letting him carry me like this! What the hell am I getting paid for? Writing? Any idiot could write! So anyway, send your adoring praise to him!
(Last known photo of Josh "Livestock" Boruff, who recently absconded to Mexico with a suitcase full of cocaine and little girls' wrists)
These sponges will make your hair WHITE and your teeth CURLY.
If you get these jokes, you KNOW you're smart!
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