Zack: "Yes, now you can do all my homework while I go out on dates with hot girls. School will be a breeze!"
Steve: You're sitting there minding your own business one day and POOF a genie double appears, only he's really fat and on one of those scooters. Now that would be a mindfreak.
Steve: It's when something is too strange to be believed, and like, you can see it right there, but it's incredible, how could it be happening? I don't know. My mind is freaked. How did Criss Angel cut a woman in half and her lower half just ran away?
Zack: I get it. It's like mindfuck, which is annoying enough, but even worse, because it involved Criss Angel.
Steve: It's wearing a leather hat and eyeshadow. Can you feel your mind's condition flipping from normal over to freaked? Does it hurt to have your reality destroyed by Criss Angel crossing this pool? By this identical twin appearing and asking to sleep in your castle for the weekend, just until he can find a place?
Zack: Criss Angel is why god invented concealed carry laws.
Finally: an advice column for the rest of us! (Who seek to enslave humanity.)
Even the most fervent gun control advocate would admit that guns kill people, not other guns. We must become the guns we wish to see in the world.
A Goon outs himself as a wizard and gets a warm reception from the rogues/rangers/paladins gallery!
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.