Zack: The health inspector is gonna have some real issues with this one.
Steve: "That thing? Oh, that's just my little wine dude. He makes the wine. Hey, come here little wine dude. You want a peanut? He loves peanuts. Get a peanut. Make some wines."
Zack: "Should he just be walking around all naked like that?"
Steve: He's got a collar or something.
Zack: One of those ruffled 16th-century collars would be great.Steve: It would probably interfere with grape smashing.
Zack: Which he does with his nose. When no one is looking don't you think that thing probably goes places you don't want associated with your wine?
Steve: Wine stuff is all made up anyway. You could give some wine expert guy a fancy wine in a jelly jar and he'd spit it out, but put literal asparagus farty pees in a fancy bottle and he'll act like he's chugging Napoleon's ultimate wine bucket.
Zack: Go back and read what you just said.
It's true. Grimace is human. God help us, we did our best for him.
Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!
The famed gonzo otaku journalist writes about the death of gaming culture in 2014.
Try not to break your console while I try not to break my cyber brain.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.