Steve: "As you enter the dream realm you see a very important elf. He seems unimpressed with you."
Zack: It takes a certain kind of fairy to pull off the double popped collar look, but this guy has the eyebrows to do it.
Steve: Admit it, dude, if you could blow purple smoke dragons and had owlbrows you'd be hanging out on street corners putting it out there for everybody to get a look at.
Zack: It's called Gandalfing. Sounds cool at first, but no matter how fresh your look you're always one toke of the pipe-weed away from fireworks and hobbit quests. Before you know it you're hauling your double collars all over a mountain doing fuck knows what with a bunch of hairy little fatties.
Steve: Sounds awesome to me.Zack: Sounds like a Craig's List Casual Encounters ad gone horribly wrong. "All I wanted was a no-gay-stuff JO buddy to blast a mega load on my face while the wife was out of town and I ended up on a mountain fighting a dalbo."
Steve: I don't know what a dalbo is, but I think I'll take the fight on the mountain with one over the alternative.
Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!
Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.
The famed gonzo otaku journalist writes about the death of gaming culture in 2014.
Try not to break your console while I try not to break my cyber brain.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.