Xorn by AED
Zack: Is this the part where James Woods pulls the pistol out of his stomach?
Steve: Xorns. Great. First a rust monster can eat all your armor and then a bunch of big hootered Xorns can gobble all your gems.
Zack: On the plus side maybe it will eat your 75,000 copper pieces.
Xorn by Jitske
Zack: This is what happens when wizards get lonely. Mordenkainen's Fantastic Fleshlight is an abomination.
Steve: It turns out the more inhuman the monster, the creepier it is when you make it look like a woman.
This is where the excerpt from an article usually goes. Since the content of this update is only intended for cool people, I refuse to place a single word in the path of blundering normal people.
Out here in the Wild West we got some rules for gunfightin', like a pregnant lady ain't gotta be carryin' iron for you to draw on her first.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.