Xorn by AED
Zack: Is this the part where James Woods pulls the pistol out of his stomach?
Steve: Xorns. Great. First a rust monster can eat all your armor and then a bunch of big hootered Xorns can gobble all your gems.
Zack: On the plus side maybe it will eat your 75,000 copper pieces.
Xorn by Jitske
Zack: This is what happens when wizards get lonely. Mordenkainen's Fantastic Fleshlight is an abomination.
Steve: It turns out the more inhuman the monster, the creepier it is when you make it look like a woman.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.