Rust Monster by Fickle Pixie
Steve: Rust monsters are the worst. I lost an entire suit of plate to one on my last fighter character. Way to be a dick, Jamie. My AC was like a baby's for the rest of that adventure.
Zack: We had a lot of entries like this one that, while good, were marred by the creeping furry crawlers.
Steve: You know that feel you get when the news does its nightly bed bug story? That's the feeling.
Giant Slug by Fickle Pixie
Zack: Truly, this captures the spirit of the contest.
Steve: Yeah, it doesn't really look like D&D art, but otherwise it's what we wanted.
Zack: That's right, folks, we wanted tits on a slug. Huge, huge breasts on an immense slug.
Steve: They're awesome. They're about to pop out of there. Then what?
Zack: That's the point where the Grunka-Lunkas come out and sing a song about cleavage.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.