Steve: Ogremoch (Prince of Evil Poops)
Zack: Yeah, we had a contest at White Dwarf. Send us the best monster a baby could come up with. A little poopy baby. Send us poopy baby's monsters.
Steve: Atlas Shrugged Man and that giant tapeworm are forming a gang with Ogremoch.
Zack: They'd better watch out or that caveman and his wolf are going to get them!
Steve: I have gotta admit, I love D&D but this guy sort of sucks.
Zack: Sort of? Look at that fucking thing and tell me that isn't contempt for the people buying the book. They might as well draw a smiley face and give it a thousand hit points and call it Tough Battler, King of the Evil Attackers.
Steve: I think Keith used Tough Battler in one of his campaigns.
Zack: He does infinity d8s in damage.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
It's time we stop tolerating lawlessness in our cities and coddling these criminals. Twenty seconds to comply is too long for ED-209 to get the job done.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.