Steve: Classic, simple, terrifying. The troll is the ultimate D&D monster.
Zack: I think it predates D&D by a year or two.Steve: That's part of what makes it the best. It's already ingrained in our fear centers in our brain. We're wired to fear trolls. It's predator-prey behavior.
Zack: From when trolls preyed upon us?Steve: They still do, my friend.
Zack: I'll admit, the regenerative aspect of trolls is creepy. They're tough and ugly and, by now, every player knows about their regeneration. So that big surprise moment where they put themselves back together and stand up once again is a little deflated.Steve: You're not using your imagination. Change it up. Don't let your players know you're dealing with a troll. Maybe they look like a normal dude who just happens to be bad.
Zack: Mine was scarier. At least a troll has a face. Mine was like a garage sale Mr. Potato Head a two-year-old was playing with.
Steve: No one is afraid of a Tirapheg dude! In all my years of playing and DMing nobody ever used a Tirapheg.Zack: It's okay to be afraid, Steve.
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
He was ripped off for True Detective, now Thomas Ligotti is being asked to review Pizza Hut's new Hotdog Pizza Bites.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.