Zack: This brother and sister duo from the same team as Constitution is known as Stars and Stripes.
Steve: How do I know which is which?
Zack: They also appear to have bags on their...are those feet?Steve: Possibly yams in condoms.
Zack: I approve of the inclusion of Asians in our patriotic, All-American super hero team. Americans will accept any race or creed, so long as you have insane nationalistic fervor and dress head-to-toe in a flag.
Steve: You also must have tiny genitals that are not at all visible through skin tight clothing.
Zack: Carol is going to tell your mom you were staring at dicks again.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.