Steve: That's ominous.
Zack: I bet this image would focus group worse than a swastika with the n-word beneath it.
Zack: "What did you call me?! It's SLO-mo, motherfucker!"
Steve: I think this dude's abs have abs.
Zack: He had an eagle implanted under his skin.
Steve: This guy has the same crazy muscles. Is that like some secret muscle group I didn't know about?
Zack: It's the Palladiumplexus.
Steve: If you want to get pumped up you have to create a definition location table and assign pumpedness ratings to all your muscle groups.
Zack: Along with several detachable missile launchers and at least one part of your body that can be described as "vibro."Steve: Come to Siembieda's Gym, men made entirely out of pouches with crazy penis heads welcome.
Zack: We'll turn your R.C.C. into an O.C.C. the hard way: by turning your race into a mutation that you can receive from super-science. Glansmen inherently pilot dirigibles, what of it?
Evil Cooper and Chechen President Ramzan Kadyrov have both been on a rampage, but who did what?
"Your left eye," the optometrist casually explained while blasting my face with a blue laser at point blank range, "is farsighted and shaped like an eyeball. The other eye is nearsighted and shaped like a football. Not even a good football."
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.