Zack: Martian canal monsters just really hate rosacea.
Steve: That dude doesn't give a crap about anything. He doesn't care about the octopus baby, the giant octopus, or his ruddy sidekick.
Zack: "Settle down. According to my chronometer it is 4:20. You know I got to blaze these trees."
Steve: The real victim here are the servants that are going to have to wash Miss Fancybottom's dress.
Zack: It's impossible to get fear shits out of a crinoline. Trust me, I ran the Haunted Horror ride at the Chicago World's Fair. More like the Brown City. We had a rubber hand on a spring that made grown men piss. The ladies had to scrape burritos out of their pleats.
Sleeping with AC is at this point a basic human right. But if you're one of the doomed souls forced to deal with global warming on a nightly basis, here's an hourly breakdown on how to get the most out of your inferno hellscape of a bedroom.
Some of the Internet's most veteran anatomy experts convened to discuss the stolen nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence and other beautiful celebrities.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.