Zack: Things totally worth your time: printing this image out, cutting out heads, hats, and accessories, and coloring them in.
Steve: These are great for character portraits.Steve: The guy in the middle there can pass for your ethnic minority of choice with the right colored crayon.
Zack: Unfortunately all female characters must be models appearing in 1950s kitchen flooring catalogs.Zack: Joanna loves the new rubber-fleck Trunoleum in her kitchen of tomorrow.
Steve: And she's also wearing a penis helmet.
Zack: And three pairs of glasses, what a saucy lady!Steve: I feel sort of sad that this one is ending.
Zack: We had a lot of fun, but people don't like to read anymore and they get mad when these go for more than ten pages.
Steve: Most of them do.Zack: Which is why everyone is always mad all the time on the Internet.
Steve: We did it?
Zack: No, Steve. You did it.
Zack: See you next time, folks!
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
It's just a little confusing, is all.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.