Zack: Sucks to your water cycle, bat ape!
Steve: He's having a worse time than when a bat got into our laundry room through the dryer vent and I chased it around for like five minutes with an aquarium net and then it somehow flew into my mouth.Zack: Rabies risk. They tell you not to do that if you find a bat during the day. "Do not place the bat into your mouth."
Steve: I didn't really place it there. I was just excited and when I get pumped I do that Michael Jordan sort of thing where he would stick his tongue out, only for me I just have my tongue flopping out and my mouth wide open. The bat landed in there.
Zack: Like a dog riding in a car with its head out the window.Steve: Exactly only I think more cavelike which would explain the bat entering my mouth.
Zack: Did you bite its head off?Steve: No way it bit me real bad on my lip and then flew back out and my mom shut it in our linen closet and I got in BIG trouble for knocking all of the nobs off our dryer and washing machine and I had to get a shot of rabies stuff. It was one of my top ten worst days of my life.
Zack: Did the bat have rabies though?
Steve: No way to know. When the animal people came they couldn't find the bat in the closet. We thought it escaped somehow but then like six months later I was going to go to the beach and I pulled out the beach towel and this bat popped out only it was like bat jerky. Scared me pretty bad and ironically I bit my tongue I was so freaked out.Zack: Of course, these things happen to all of us.
They told us to stop playing videogames on a school night. If only we'd ignored them.
As a vicious predator, I find that I have a constant, overwhelming urge to lick apples out of a huge block of ice. It's only, natural, right?
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.