Zack: It's Homer from Bart the General.
Steve: Bro looks like he got on Toadfish's bad side.
Zack: "I'm drunk as hell, but I still showed up for the race war! Who are we exterminating today?"
Steve: If you think orcs ever successfully exterminate anyone then you've never played D&D. Maybe in some game where they spell it with a "k" and all the orks are super beefy, but in D&D they are always the genocided, not the genociders.
Zack: An orc is a really ugly man with no teeth. Pretty much human vagrants are orcs. That is the takeway from this garbage artwork.
Steve: An orc is anyone without health insurance.
Zack: Welcome to Obama's Faerun.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.