Steve: Yo, this is OG D&D style right here. Name randomly jammed in there and ridiculous old lady with no pants riding a horse.
Zack: Somebody, presumably a human, looked at this image and said, "Yes, that's good. Let's put it in the front of our book."
Steve: Maybe that sort of quality control explains why there are multiple pages of naval combat rules and minimal character creation information.
Zack: Poor quality control can't explain why they decided to devote nearly an entire page to egotistical swords.
Steve: "Yeah, I had a pretty sweet sword until it made me find some weakass punk and then it gave itself to him."
Zack: Magic sword divas get a page, describing clerics gets one paragraph.
Steve: Actually, that sounds about right. Boring church people vs. magical swords that talk and scheme against you. My bad, Gygax.
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
He was ripped off for True Detective, now Thomas Ligotti is being asked to review Pizza Hut's new Hotdog Pizza Bites.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.