"The hollow echo of your footsteps tells you just how big this room is. There's not much you can see, but what you can is confusing. Your lights shine upon cold iron tanks that look gnomish in nature, while pages from some arcane text litter the floor. Along the walls, you catch glimpses of pots, pans, and other kitchen tools, and above all a stale, salty air with the lingering sweetness of corruption. As you step further inside, you realize it is not as empty as it seems. With a loud hiss and grinding clanks, a cloud of steam issues from the shadows..."
Steve: That Skywarps Hat dude sent like five entries into the contest so I feel like the dude deserves something for his effort.
Zack: What is this, grade school field day? No medals for participation. The concept for the self-cooking necro lobster is great. We will award it with recognition.
Steve: A certain barbarian could be carving up a lobster tail and dipping it in mega butter right now if you weren't so lazy with DMing.
Zack: Keep your lemons hand, you may yet face the Nechromard.
Transgressive author Chuck Palahniuk is here to help with tips and tricks to hacking your life.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.