Zack: The Wizard's Ennui.
Steve: This is the most jaded dude in all of Myth Drannor. He doesn't give a crap what you are doing. He has seen it all, man.
Zack: He looks a little bit like he cast summon toilet and the spell went wrong and he just went with it.
Zack: "Oh, you think I won't shit on this giant snail? Watch this..."Steve: I hate wizards. They are pretty much the worst thing about D&D next to sorcerers. This dude is like a propaganda poster of wizard stereotypes and I kind of need a barbarian to bust in here and cleave some limbs off this dude. Maybe shove that snail into a salt mine or something.
Zack: "Hey, occupied! I'm on the snail!"
Steve: That is not going to work. A barbarian will definitely chop the head off a dude going to the bathroom.
Zack: Definitely? Like if I put up a Craigslist ad "DUMPING DUDE SEEKS AXE LOVER TO CHOP UP MY FACE, ME + YOU, RUIN MY 2 AND LEAVE ME HEADLESS" I am going to get some action?
Steve: Yeah just post it to the Icewind Dale Craigslist.
‘Toad coin?’ wondered the traveler as he examined the pebble. It did not look all that different from any other pebble, and certainly nothing like a coin. ‘What manner of coin has no head or tail, and bears no seal or flag? Who backs this toad coin, the toad bank? The toad treasury!?’ The traveler laughed, but the toads croaked sternly back at him.
Spending $10-15 a day on perishable organic dog food is not a sign of a decadent culture in terminal decline, it's actually real good and worth it.
No lifeguard on duty. Maze run at your own risk.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.