Dungeons & Dragons: The Book of Wondrous Inventions

Steve: It would be really hard to bust a pimple in this mirror.

Zack: If you use the mirror to remove a botfly larva when it pops out it will look just like your favorite flavor of jellybean!

Steve: Aw! I saw a video where they took one of those out of some guy's head and it looked like a little baby man. It had a face and everything.

Zack: What did the face look like?

Steve: It had a crying mouth and sad eyes and a pencil thin mustache that went all the way around its mouth. And it had a split tongue, but not like a snake, it was like this girl I saw a picture of on some website of weird tattoo pictures.

Zack: You did not see a video where that happened.

Steve: I meant I dreamed I watched a video of that happening, because I saw a video on Liveleak of a botfly, but I didn't click it because that's gross. I didn't want to see a little baby man with a mustache get pulled out of some guy's head.

Zack: Uhhhhh, getting back to the mirror, I have to say I don't understand its function.

Steve: Self-esteem. It's important even in D&D.

Zack: Is there a stat for it?

Steve: It's sort of Charisma.

Zack: "Roll to see if your botched showing in the combat forces you into a spiral of overeating and poor body image."

Steve: That's not how it works.

Zack: "Roll bend bars/drop panties for all the wrong guys."