Big deals were being made aboard the OneSoul Bus, where every soul is just a point on a spectrum with infinite gradients that mostly corresponded to topless, overweight white women with dreadlocks. Saudi firm Trident Investments snapped up Spoogr (pronounced like "booger"), a new video game console targeted at heiresses that will cost $699 and play the demo versions of Android phone games.
Spoogr is the brainchild of Vyktorea Rothschild, a computer program that procedurally designs baffling status symbols for twenty-something Silicon Valley new money. Vyktorea generated one of last year's hottest properties, SPLUkk, an app for tracking the patterns of homeless people using public information to create "beggar avoidance algorithms."
The first time "fast", "decisive", and "efficient" could have been used to describe the Minecraft development team was when they snatched the $2.5 billion dollar check out of Microsoft's sweaty, shaking hand.
Paleo guru and definite non-idiot Luke K. clears the air about some of your favorite pumpkin treats this holiday season. Also he weighs in on the controversy surrounding a paleo wedding cake.
No lifeguard on duty. Maze run at your own risk.
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.