Life's a Zoo with Tom "Moof" Davies

Moof: do you ever go to the zoo and take a lot of scarves for the giraffes and then try and put them on the giraffes but get arrested
Moof: why is it a crime to keep giraffes warm
Moof: i am going to go at night
Moof: in a van
Moof: with scarves in the back of the van
Moof: are you in
Moof: do you ever go to the zoo
Moof: and take jackets for the penguins
Moof: and coats for the polar bears
Moof: but the polar bears just claw at you
Moof: and the penguins peck at you
Moof: and the elephants chase you
Moof: :(
Livestock: moof i am in for this job
Livestock: but on one condition
Livestock: we're going to put roller skates on a gorilla
Moof: okay the saint bernards will carry the roller blades
Livestock: i'm afraid the saint bernards no longer work for me
Moof: what happened
Livestock: they formed a union :(
Moof: :(
Livestock: I'm going to go as a vampire
Livestock: what are you going as
Moof: this isn't some kind of fancy dress party
Moof: this is serious business
Livestock: okay i'll dress as al capone
Moof: okay i will be don corleone
Livestock: lets make these giraffes an offer they can't refuse
Moof: hehe
Moof: an offer of
Moof: scarves
Moof: is that the correct plural
Moof: or is it scarfs
Livestock: i think it is scarvi
Moof: no that doesnt seem right
Livestock: no i know my latin
Moof: oh ok
Livestock: that is the male plural ending of scarvus
Livestock: which i think is latin for scarves
Moof: i think you are right

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

More Mooflogs

This Week on Something Awful...

  • GLUT OF DOGS

    GLUT OF DOGS

    TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851

  • THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.

Copyright ©2016 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.