Pamela Anderson's 2002 Buick LeSabre
It might not look so bad on the outside, but bombshell Pam's decrepit LeSabre has been hit by that bomb on the inside. It has over 300,000 miles (she gets around!!) worn out shocks (gets around) and stains on the upholstery (around). The Carfax for this thing is just a skull and the word NO.
Lil' Kim's 1997 BMW 328i
Rapper Lil' Kim once used to have one of the hottest "whips" in America. Now she is riding just plain old dirty with this walleyed BMW that looks like it hasn't seen a waxing in at least ten years. Hey, Kim, leave the headlight replacements to the professionals. What you are doing here is not working.
Anyone can own a car, but if you're famous, you'd better not drive it into the ground or be gross. Because we're watching you.
After years of being misunderstood, I had hoped we finally had "our" story. I was wrong.
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.