You enter the gas station and walk straight to the soda case. An obnoxious country song comes out of the speakers, and you notice that there is no one inside. You pull out a large Mountain Dew and head to the cashier. Groping your pockets, you realize that you don't have any money. He smirks, but tells you that he can't give goods out for free.
"Listen," you say, getting his attention, then tell him how important it is that you get this soda.
"Well, I guess there is one way you can get your soda" He says, smiling.
Over the last few weeks an outnumbered but brave group of men calmly used facts and logic to conclusively prove that women are ruining video games with their lustful object bodies. But there are other threats to everything gamers hold dear.
Sleeping with AC is at this point a basic human right. But if you're one of the doomed souls forced to deal with global warming on a nightly basis, here's an hourly breakdown on how to get the most out of your inferno hellscape of a bedroom.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.