You open the door and jump right on in. Classical music fills the limo, but it takes a second for your eyes to adjust. On the other end of the limo sits an elderly woman in a red dress. She asks if you're thirsty. You ask if they have any Mountain Dew, but she says no, the only soda she has is Tab. Memories from earlier fill your mind, and rage blinds you.
"Fuck Tab." You say, scooting over to the exit. "Take me home."
And she does.
Good day. We are Hester and Karl, and we are something rare. We are a couple ... of Stock Photo Lifestylists! Lifestylers? We lead a Stock Photo Lifestyle.
I want my bed to look like the health department is checking for bedbugs. I want to feel like it’s on an episode of Maury getting scanned for semen.
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
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