In front of you is a beautiful twenty-something year old woman showering. Well, actually in front of you is a black shower curtain, but behind that is a beautiful woman. Well, that's what you think based on the smell of soap and your imaginative sexuality.
A woman's voice comes from behind the curtain. "Hello?" She says. Yes! You were right. A woman, a hot woman hopefully, well at least a woman.
"Oh sorry" you mumble.
"Is that the passed out boy? I'm glad you're awake!"
"Yeah, hey what Black Sabbath song was that?"
"Rat Salad. Well, I'm all done" She says, turning off the water. Her towel is pulled off the curtain rod as she steps out of the tub. She is just as beautiful as you imagined. The young woman walks past you, filling your senses with desire, lust, and a clean mango smell as she walks into her bedroom on the other side of the hall, leaving you in the bathroom. You look around the room and notice her clothes sitting on the ground. A pair of panties sit on top. You try and think about what to do. "What would Naruto do," you ask yourself. But Naruto did not answer.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
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