You carefully check the tires, put on your helmet, make sure the handlebars are aligned, and remove the baseball card that made your bike sound like a motorcycle. You'll miss the THYACK-THYACK-THYACK noise, but oh well. You fit two cans of Mountain Dew into the water bottle slot and quickly walk the bike to the curb. You take one last glance at your house before peddling off. A great journey is about to start.
After years of being misunderstood, I had hoped we finally had "our" story. I was wrong.
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.