Mother

Tell your children I've got an upside down cross,
which is like a cross but upside down,
which means I don't like the cross,
and I even added a skull,
cuz I mean itttt!

Mother

I'll make the baddest bugs fight in a box,
charge your kids a quarter to watch.
Gonna put their hands in a bowl of cooked pasta,
and tell them it's a demon's guts.

Mother

Tell your children to bring me some ones,
cuz the change machine doesn't take fives.
I can show them how to smooth their bills,
till they're accepted.

Mother

Tell your children about my ninja stars,
and if they wanna find ninjitsu moves,
I can take them out to the garage,
where I made a dummy.

Mother

Not about to see your light,
I got an air pistol and a mesh shirt,
teach your children to wear black jeans in summer,
pretend we know things about the devil,
and light a scented candle my grandma gave meeeeee!

Father

If you wanna butt heads with me,
I'll lift weights in front of your kids,
and talk to them about Japanese cartoons,
and then we're gonna play Risk,
with a custom map I made of Hell,
and get a meat lovers
pizzzzzaaaaa!

Mother

Not about to see your light,
I only believe in the darkness,
of talking about owning a castle,
and how cool it would be as a real werewolf,
and if you let them hang out past ten,
they'll get to meet Henry Rollins,
and play with my sister's ferrets.

Mother

Tell your children to take their shoes off at the door,
It's sort of a rule since we put in that floor,
but Cynthia doesn't have to,
in her go-go boots,
cuz we're serious.
Yeaaahhhh!

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

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