|Names: Thexetor Warwick, Thex, Generalissimo Balldrainer|
Areas: Denver, Under Denver, Sub-Denver, Ur-Denver
Height: 1.74 meters
Weight: 174 kilograms
Hair: Oiled, blacked, inflammable
Face: Tom Clancy
Eyes: Approximately even
Bust: Caramel and nougat
|KINGSEX||YES||From a block away I thought it was a giant eggplant. She felt like it too, all the best. Love.|
|thasniffer||YES||Just a bit of astringent over the aroma of sour sores and smegma. She pulled me down into a sewer of pleasure.|
|thasniffer||YES||Second visit. Her legs were off in a good way. Something came bubbling out and I loved it.|
|thrillho||YES||Owned her face. Gave it to her like I was UPS man with a boner delivery. She loved it.|
|japan_travels||YES||Breeding pool in lair. Ape man shambles to a baby, and then I explode. Give some more to me, thanks!|
|Names: Krysmas Crayons, Bendbars Liftgates, Dakota|
Areas: Los Angeles, San Diego, Sector 14
Height: 3 stories
Weight: Displaces 800-tons
Hair: Unexpected, prehensile
Face: Alphabetically organized
Bust: Detachable when startled
|thasniffer||NO||Lots of smell folds and coves, but she smells like a desiccant packet from a salt shaker.|
|rob_gurt||NO||Shattered our windows with her unearthly wail, would not come down off the ceiling. Finally we had to chase her out with a broom. Left her tits everywhere.|
|KINGSEX||NO||Might as well have fucked the tits of a yield sign. Christ almighty.|
|Chuck||YES||I love your pics Krysmas. Where do you hang out? I would like to get to know you and maybe buy you dinner. Can you take a check if I make it out to "cash?"|
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.