AzramLegion is up to six fingers these days.

In twelve days Bimston will enter his cocoon and come out looking exactly like Wilford Brimley. This is the miracle of life.

DevCore has made a vow to find and kill the vending machine that murdered his family.

I traded all my nickel rookie cards when I heard he abused steroids to make this image.

The Matthew138 is much safer than previous Matthew models, which were known to have glitches in their ethics subsystems.

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  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

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